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Your 9AM
Podcast Episode • Web Version
April 10, 2020
In today's story, an attorney attempts to correct the boss's disregard for gender identity on multiple occasions, while representing clients for that exact problem.  How would you convince your manager to take pronouns more seriously?  And how long would you try?

Talking about this story with Anna and Rachel Ayers on the podcast helped me recognize that I haven't been showing up 100% for the people that struggle with this on a daily basis.  Curious to hear other reactions, so reply to this email and let us know.

In addition to this week's story, if you're a manager dealing with pay cuts and layoffs, check out examples of people doing this the right way after the podcast notes. 
Listen to the podcast
no way
Consider this experience
I worked on several cases for workplace rights where the clients identified as they/them. On multiple occasions, my boss couldn't remember to use the correct pronoun for the client. When I would remind him he would kind of laugh it off and make some comment about being old and not understanding it. I decided to provide some resources to him about pronouns and why it’s important to acknowledge preferred pronouns.

He was actually very open to receiving the feedback and would often validate the corrections. But it was frustrating that he continued to make the same mistakes. He also would try to correct my writing when I used they/them pronouns when referring to the client and would say it wasn’t grammatically correct, asking me to include an explanation in complaints as to why we were using they/them. I felt that was bad practice as we do not explain using he or she and therefore explaining our use of they/them perpetuated the idea that it is abnormal to identify as such.

I just couldn't believe that we were suing people for doing this, but couldn't take it seriously on our side.
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TL;DL (Too Long; Didn't Listen)
Is there a difference between the person that fails to acknowledge or use non-binary pronouns in everyday language, and the person that does so and laughs it off?  Is this relevant to solving the problem?
"I want to use they/them but it doesn't sound natural to me." 
Listen at 2:30

Being aware isn't enough.  This issue requires a more systematic solution. 

Listen to the podcast
Managing in the pandemic?

We've talked about this before, but being transparent and vulnerable goes a long way.  Here's a few words from someone that did just that earlier this week.

"This week was the most difficult of my career. I can rationalize business decisions and I’ve let go of hundreds of people in my career, but this time feels very different.

After we notified all of the impacted employees we communicated to our broader team what we had to do, why, and how we’re going to move forward together. We told the team we would prepare for the worst but hope for the best, and that in these times what is important is that we come together and feel connected to each other and our clients, and be human. Be aware that the world we are living in today is not and will not be the same world we knew a month ago and that the more empathy and compassion we can have, the better we will all be for it. It was really difficult and our CEO was tearing up on the call, and our CFO (my boss) cried to us after that. We showed humility and unity, and the transparency made people feel whole. We did not sugar coat at all and I think our team appreciated it.

I was incredibly humbled by the number of employees who reached out to me to say, I’m sorry I know this must be so difficult or telling me they’re here if I need someone to talk to or asking how they can help me in the coming weeks. In HR we are accustomed to being the support for others, being the messenger for difficult decisions and unfortunately sometimes being the face of those decisions and seen as the enemy. But this week, I have never felt more supported, even from those who I had to let go."

And if you're fortunate enough to keep your staff, but with challenging conditions (pay cuts, reduced hours, etc), consider what we talked about in the story where a firm replaces raises with bonuses and then skips handing out the bonuses: make sure the people at the top carry most of the burden, and that you over-communicate this up front.

One company decided to hand out pay cuts based on level, where C-suite executives took a 75% cut and junior staff took a 5-10% cut.  This isn't a great situation for anyone, but if I were working here as a junior staff member I would be highly motivated and engaged, knowing that the people I work for recognize their privilege and are making significant sacrifices to keep the ball rolling.

Have something to share?  We would love to hear from you!  Feel free to reply directly to this email with any comments or feedback.  You can also leave us voice messages on our Anchor podcast page.
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